reflections in the morning...

children's camp and soccer camp as has been quite an encouragement to me. Talking to jeremy and seeing his faith and trust in God was a blessing. Thank You, Lord, for raising up the leaders. I find it so inspiring to see younger people (i am getting older by the day haha.) taking great steps of faith and having the Lord deal with them. I always feel that trials and obstacles are opportnities to find/meet with God and learn something new about yourself. Of course, by the grace of God, we will resolve the problem in His name and in His power. Watching the children play just brings great joy in my heart. I wanna have kids! I never really had the ability to reach out to them, to comfort them, though I'd love to. As I watch them play and laugh and cry, as I listen to them sing out to God or to their stories, I am grateful for that faith and innocence that they have. life can be that beautiful...

Heading down to both camps, I was given the chance to know and get closer to my brothers and sister in Christ. I am starting to feel the sense of belonging and familial love and security that I longed to have. I pray that I can give them back the same or greater amount of love, support and encouragement that they have given me. Thank You for the time that I can have with them and it makes me even happier that we will all meet each other on the other side (well, that's heaven) at the end of the long road.

I embrace my solitude and my loneliness at the same time. It gives me a great sense of peace and sometimes I feel that I am closest to God this way. It's rather releasing to just let your thoughts flow and go wherever they want. It is in these periods that I have the urge to pen my thoughts down. Alas, I can find no words. I should practice writing more and as a brother encouraged, find the subconciousness to commit my thoughts to Godm to turn the periods of solitude to conversations with God.

Like this morning.

Lord, thank You for children's camp. Thank You for this beautiful day. Amen.

24th June, 8.38am

With the merciful thou wilt shew thyself merciful, and with the upright man thou wilt shew thyself upright.
With the pure thou wilt shew thyself pure; and with the froward thou wilt shew thyself unsavoury.
And the afflicted people thou wilt save: but thine eyes are upon the haughty, that thou mayest bring them down.
For thou art my lamp, O LORD: and the LORD will lighten my darkness.
For by thee I have run through a troop: by my God have I leaped over a wall.
As for God, his way is perfect; the word of the LORD is tried: he is a buckler to all them that trust in him.
For who is God, save the LORD? and who is a rock, save our God?
God is my strength and power: and he maketh my way perfect.

2 Samuel 22: 26-33

Faults

Sara Teasdale (1884-1933)

1 They came to tell your faults to me,
2 They named them over one by one;
3 I laughed aloud when they were done,
4 I knew them all so well before, --
5 Oh, they were blind, too blind to see
6 Your faults had made me love you more.

i love it. i really do.

the love that lives in the letters, in the songs. the memories that only swim in our heads and stay in our hearts. and like how she says it, they always draw new inspiration. but sometimes they don't, and its not because the feeling has died, but because it has become part of you and me. we think about the once-in-a-while long phonecalls and the senseless bickering in our smses, we laugh and we cry. its the kind of friendship you know that refuses to die (not that you want it to) and even after months of not seeing each other or talking that much, you know that she'll still take your crap. and for that, and for many other things, you'd take hers too. sometimes you feel like you haven't done enough and you wanna do so much more for all that she's put in to do for you. i guess it will always be like this, it goes on.

you are thankful, you are glad that she's always around, in the heart and in the mind. always.

i am. i really am.

and i love it. i really do.

(from a very good friend.)

I think one of the most universal human experiences is feeling alone. You'd never know it, but there's most likely tons of people feeling the exact same way. Maybe because you're feeling abandoned. Maybe because you realise that you aren't as self-sufficient as you thought you were. Either was, when you hit that low point, you have a choice. You can either wallow in self-pity...Or you can suck it up. It's your call.

To most people, it might have seemed that nothing had changed. But it had a little.

It's about the day I realised that admitting we're not heroic is when we're most heroic of all.

JD,
Scrubs